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Joke thread.

Discussion in 'The Breakroom' started by Shike, Feb 3, 2016.

  1. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    A bossy man goes into a bar.
    He orders everyone a round.
     
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  2. jag-engr
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    jag-engr Semper Bufo!
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    Close, but no mention of Zoom...
     
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  3. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    Which lawn decorations move around from yard to yard?
    Gnomads.
     
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  4. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    What sounds like a sneeze and is made of leather?
    A shoe
     
  5. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    Wanted to mention that yesterday I volunteered for the
    vaccine trials for Covid-19. They just started in the Eastern
    Pennsylvania area. The vaccine is one that was created in Russia.
    I received my first shot at 4:00 pm, and I wanted to let
    you all know that it’s completely safe, with иo side effects
    whatsoeveя, and that I feelshκι χoρoshό я чувствую себя
    немного странно и я думаю, что вытащил ослиные уши.
     
  6. victograph

    victograph Loaded Pockets

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    Planned to go hiking in an area known to be frequented by bears. Went to the local shop to ask if they sold the bear deterrent bells. The owner said yes we have two styles. One style is two small bells to tie to your shoes. They make lots of noise while you walk. You use them around black bears. They’re called bear bells. The other style is for use around grizzly bears. I asked how is it different? He said there’s only one bell on a cord and you wear it around your neck. It’s called a dinner bell.
     
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  7. victograph

    victograph Loaded Pockets

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    Do psychics require you to make an appointment, or do they just know you will be stopping by?


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
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  8. Marskindri

    Marskindri Loaded Pockets

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    What did the hamburger name its baby? :rofl_revamped: Patty :bounce::bounce::bounce:
     
  9. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    We came from dust,
    we will return to dust.
    That's why I don't dust,
    it could be someone I know.
     
  10. Rasthor

    Rasthor Loaded Pockets

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    I know. Didn't do Teams, either.
     
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  11. EZDog

    EZDog EDC Junkie!!!!!

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    [​IMG]


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
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  12. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
     
  13. jag-engr
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    jag-engr Semper Bufo!
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    I 've never heard of a church using Teams. Zoom is better for the less tech-savvy.
     
  14. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    Here's a bit of advice for everyone: Advi
     
  15. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    What kind of exercise do lazy people do?
    Diddly-squats.
     
  16. victograph

    victograph Loaded Pockets

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    My wife asked me if I could tell her what “mansplaining” is? I stared at her with only one thought in my head. “It’s a trap......”


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  17. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    The object of golf is to play as little golf as possible.
     
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  18. victograph

    victograph Loaded Pockets

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    Guess I learned something new from the forum. Bang Good is an overseas vendor. I thought “Bang Good” was a review of a firearm.


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  19. asemery

    asemery Loaded Pockets

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    Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave the house.
     
  20. jag-engr
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    jag-engr Semper Bufo!
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    It's a buyer's market.
     
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