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It's loaded.

Discussion in 'Handguns' started by Atomic, Mar 20, 2010.

  1. Atomic

    Atomic Loaded Pockets

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    We recently purchased at .38 special for my wife. I got her a speed loader and put it on the shelf. She didn't want it loaded in the house. No problem. I went and got a safe. I loaded it and put it in the safe. She was doing a drill and ran in and opened the safe. Before she took it out I said "It's loaded." She gets real angry about it. We have kids. I told her that's what the safe is for, and that the ammo is right there next to it anyway. The kids could get it and easily load a revolver. My XD45 she had trouble with racking the slide. I had the magazine in it and she got angry about that too. She took it out and put it on the shelf.

    Am I wrong? If I'm right how can I convince her that it's just as safe either way?
     
  2. copierguy_mobile

    copierguy_mobile Loaded Pockets

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    The pistol I use for defense is loaded, regardless of where it is. I purchased a GunVault safe for that one pistol so I can keep it loaded and close at hand (I have small children too). My other firearms are unloaded and in another safe.

    IMHO, keeping a loaded gun in a quick opening safe is a reasonable and safe compromise between the extremes of keeping it unloaded and locked up all the time vs. leaving a loaded gun in my nightstand.

    -Greg
     
  3. Tango 191

    Tango 191 Loaded Pockets

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    your not wrong, Rule your kids with a iron fist, so she knows that they wont go looking for mommy and daddys gun?, i keep my glock in a safe by my bed unloaded with 3 loaded mags right next to it, i dont have any kids and i live alone. Anyway make sure your kids know, that firearms arent toys and that they are never to touch it unless they ask/ or have either of you present (i dont know hte ages of your kids), or better yet hide the safe in your room dont tell your kids you have it, teach them proper firearm handling (then tell them), then go from there?
    im just throwing out ideas? either way if she doesnt feel comftorable having a loaded gun secured in the house either on your person or in a safe, then i think she needs to take some "nothing with happen to you or your kids if its loaded in the safe" classes :). but i do understand her concern.
    let us know what you decide to do?
     
  4. oakchas

    oakchas Loaded Pockets

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    You're not wrong.

    Do you have a fire extinguisher?

    Might as well put that in the safe too.

    You have children. You do run fire drills at home, right?

    Have a bad guy drill. Give her fair warning... give her a 3 day window...

    Then, some night this week, when you normally come home from work, don't enter thru the garage... Walk up to the front door, open it quietly and carefully and yell BANG ( the front door being kicked in).

    If the kids are in the livingroom watching tv, theyre toast... run willy nilly thru the house until you find her... She better have the safe open

    This stuff happens IRL.. It's happening more often, in the nicest neighborhoods in the smallest towns... I know people who carry ALL THE TIME... I won't go that far. My kids are grown and out of the house... I have a couple of dogs that might slow somebody down long enough for me to get to the LOADED, un safed gun (s)... Without the "early warning system" (the dogs) I might be temped to have more guns in easy reach no matter where I was in the house.
     
  5. SF1

    SF1 Banned

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    We live in a well to do neighborhood, that both my wife and I worked hard to be able to do, however, the thugs think they can come in here and help them selvs to whatever.

    I have always had a weapon loaded for an invasion, and do practice what to do. I raised my daughter to understand firearms, and taught her how to shoot, just in case. She is now in college, but we never had a problem.

    Problem is, not all parents that keep firearms at the ready can, and do have nuts for kids, and these are the cases that end up in the news.

    I feel it is on a case by case basis. If there is any chance you Can't trust your kids, I may not even have a gun. Crazy kids, and firearms are just as bad as the bad guy's.

    I see no real clear, standard answer to this.

    I was lucky to have a trustworthy child then teen.
     
  6. lukem

    lukem Empty Pockets

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    To paraphrase the first rule of firearms safety: All guns are loaded. (treat them that way)
    Unless you are on the range, and doing real shooting drills, don't run drills with a loaded gun. (that's how TVs get shot)
    BTW, good job on at least running a drill! I know several folks that bought a firearm for "home defense" and don't even drill on getting to it, much less loading and firing.

    You didn't specify the ages of the kids, but they are kept away from kitchen knives, hazardous cleaners, and your power tools, which can all be deadly if used incorrectly.
    Firearms are no different, and education is FAR more likely to keep them safe than hiding the guns and turning them into a mysterious attraction.

    On racking the slide, I'd suggest having her hold the gun in a fighting grip in her strong hand, wrap her non-dominant hand over the slide to grip it, then push FORWARD with the strong hand while pulling BACK with her non-dominant hand at the same time. This distributes the force of the recoil spring across both hands/wrists/arms, and should make racking the slide much easier.

    As with any firearm intended for self/home defense, get her to a range and training as much as possible! (Who knows she might decide she likes it!)
     
  7. Skipperbrown

    Skipperbrown Loaded Pockets

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    You can't. She has to convince herself. Ask her to load the gun as fast as she can using the speedloader. Unless she has practiced a lot she just may end up w/ the rounds on the floor. If it's a J frame, it will take much longer. Time her. Try it again and again. It takes a bad guy about 3 seconds to cover 20 feet. Now ask her how long she thinks it will take to load the gun if she is scared and shaking. Now empty the revolver and if it has a hammer :censored: it. Drop it on the rug, throw it on the bed and show her it won't discharge. Uncock it and twirl the gun on your finger. It won't :censored: itshelf and discharge. These activities should convince her the gun won't go off by itself. Then ask her to break into the safe. She won't be able to do it. Now if she thinks it is not safe to have a loaded gun in the house, then the next best thing is an unloaded gun w/ bullets nearby. You can't push a string, but you can try to teach one!
     
  8. Monocrom

    Monocrom Loaded Pockets

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    No, you're not wrong. . . You're just not going to win that arguement. Not happening.

    Ask her what she thinks would be a good compromise between being ready and making sure the kids stay safe. Then take it from there.
     
  9. Skipperbrown

    Skipperbrown Loaded Pockets

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    There isn't any mention that your wife has shot this gun very much. The more she shoots, the more comfortable she will be with the gun. You should take her to the range at least once a month to work on her skills. If she hasn't ever shot this gun, you need to re-think her going to it in an emergency. She'd probably be better off w/ pepper spray or a baseball bat especially if there are little ones elsewhere in the house.
     
  10. BCGarrick

    BCGarrick BST/Marketplace ban

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    Well, I have no children and ALL my gins are loaded, Shotguns, rifles, pistol. Fact is YOU SHOULD TREAT EVERY GUN AS IF IT WERE LOADED OR NOT, SO WHY HANDLE IT DIFFERENTLY? Just my opinion.
     
  11. Flight-ER-Doc

    Flight-ER-Doc Loaded Pockets

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    I think I'd agree with you, assuming it's a half-way decent safe. If she (or the kids) have trouble racking the slide on an auto, leaving the mag in and chamber empty is an option. But she's being silly: An unloaded gun is just a poor club, and having the ammo nearby is essential when you NEED a gun.
     
  12. Atomic

    Atomic Loaded Pockets

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    Thanks for all the replies. I think she's just scared and needs to shoot more. We don't have a good place to shoot so we are limited there but I'm going to try to get a place.
     
  13. Quigley

    Quigley Empty Pockets

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    Atomic,
    This is all about how your wife evaluates risk.
    For her, anything that might increase danger at home seems too risky.

    My wife had the same feelings until she came home late one night.
    She found that her roommate surprised the men waiting to rape her.
    She bought a S&W M19 the next day, learned to shoot, and keeps it at her side of the bed in a handgun quick-opening safe.
    She now believes that the world is too risky to be unarmed.

    Reframing your wife's sense of what is too risky will take some care.
    I wish you the best.
    Q
     
  14. bquinlan

    bquinlan Loaded Pockets

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    I think you are wise to recognize that and work with her. Helping her to acquire the knowledge and experience that will allow her to make better decisions for herself is the best long-term approach.

    If she has not been through a basic handgun course I would strongly recommend that. My wife started out terrified of firearms. A couple of local instructors got her past that to the point where she is now an enthusiastic and competent shooter.

    Best of luck!

    --Bob Q
     
  15. jakeiscrazy

    jakeiscrazy Loaded Pockets

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    I think the best thing is to learn to trust you children. Teach them firearms discipline. Let them handle them when they ask, and don't make it into a forbidden item. Everybody want's to touch what they are told they can't. Take them shooting, including the wife. Just my opinion, your family, your responsibly, and your decision.

    Good Luck.
     
  16. Monocrom

    Monocrom Loaded Pockets

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    Try to make it into a "date," that the two of you can enjoy together. Drive together to the nearest range. Work with her to overcome any sort of fears she might still have. Do some shooting. Perhaps bring a romantic picnic lunch (minus any alcohol of course) that the two of you can enjoy afterwards.

    Keep the firearms locked in the car, but picnic near the car. That way it won't seem like a chore to drive out to the nearest range. And at the very least, you'll make her feel special.
     
  17. In_The_Pitt

    In_The_Pitt Loaded Pockets

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    I like this idea. Here's another. Buy 5 of those orange practice dummy rounds. Run this drill with the wife. Pound on the front door like a home invader when she isn't expecting it. She has to run to the safe, unlock it, load the pistol and be prepared to shoot before you unlock the front door with your key and walk into the bedroom. I doubt she will be able to do it. Give her a few chances and see if she can beat you. Then ask how safe she feels with the gun unloaded.
     
  18. EDCPHREAK

    EDCPHREAK Empty Pockets

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    While carrying CCW my Kel-Tec .380 it's loaded including one round in the chamber ready to go. I don't feel I'd have the time to rack the slide in event of being in fear for my life....

    I clearly understand the debate, and when grand kids come to visit, of course the gun is locked away PERIOD NO EXCEPTIONS
     
  19. Skipperbrown

    Skipperbrown Loaded Pockets

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    And this makes perfect sense. Let's face it, we are the prey and surprise is the best way to take prey. There is a good chance you will be struck before you can react. If one arm is disabled in the initial attack, you may not be able to rack the slide or you may not have time. Besides most modern guns are designed to be safely carried loaded in a *good holster*.

    Comfort w/ a loaded gun comes from practice and more practice. I used to be worried about carrying a locked and cocked 1911, but after unsuccessfully trying to beat the safeties and make the hammer fall on an unloaded gun and carrying one cocked and locked empty for a month, I convinced myself a properly maintained, holstered 1911 ain't going off by itself. Period. I bet my life on it routinely now.
     
  20. Geargrrl

    Geargrrl Empty Pockets

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    Just throwing one more thought into the mix. I don't own a gun, and I don't have kids in the house, However, when I think about getting one (a gun, not a child), the fact that I have friends with kids who visit regularly changes how I can safely keep a weapon. Point being, even if you train your own kids to respect and behave responsibly around firearms, you also have to consider the actions of those you have no real educational control over.